Quote: Hold up, that's Edgar Deams. I'm telling you he only wears that one God damn jacket.
Quote: 1. Stupid son of a bitch. Knock himself cold. 2. Cold my ass. He's dead. We killed it, we killed it....FUUUUCCKKKK YOOOUUUU
Quote: Broke into the wrong God damn rec room didn't you? You bastards!
Quote: 1)Hey Melvin, wanna make a buck? 2)Aw, eat it
Quote: Then we all run like god-damn bastards..... pardon my french
Quote: You touch that truck and die!!!
Quote: I vote for outta space..... ain't no way these are local boys!!


Quote: Run for it? Running's not a plan! Running's what you do once a plan fails!
Quote: Well, there sure as hell ain't nothing to stop us now... everybody we know between here and Bixbe's already dead.

Quote: I can't believe we said no to free beer!
Quote: Why not tonight?
Quote: 1/What kind of fuse is that???______ 2/ Cannon fuse____ 1/ What the hell do you use THAT for??____ 2/ My cannon.....
Quote: Well....... we're sure not gunna pole-vault outta here ..... that's for damn sure!!!
Quote: 1/ Good luck, shithead...... 2/ Dont worry about me, jerkoff
Quote: 1/Broke into the wrong goddamn rec-room didnt ya , you bastard!!!!______ We killed it, you got that?? We killed that mother-humper!!!....... come back____ 2/ Roger that, Bert and congratulations..... but be advised however, that there are two more..... repeat.... two more mother-humpers
Quote: AAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGHHHH!!!!!!!!__________ damn prairie-dog burrow......!!!!!!
Quote: 1/Those snake things couldn't travel THAT fast________ 2/ Shit, for all you know they could fly......

Quote: Who died and made YOU Einstein????!!!
Quote: Doesn't he have a home to go to??!!
Quote: FUUUCK YOU!!!!
Quote: Shit Earl, for all you know they could fly....
Quote: ..... slicker than snot & I aint lyin'...
Quote: theres a stamped up your ass
Quote: EARL: You know, if you wanted, we could take a look at those seismographs for her.
VAL: What the hell do we know about seismographs?
EARL: Nothing. But it sure might be a nice way of getting to know her.
VAL: Why?
EARL: gosh darn it, Valentine, you won't go for any gal unless she fits that damn list of yours A to Z...
VAL: Well, sure.
EARL: ...And is dumber than my hind end. Like that Bobby Lynn Dexter...
VAL: (defensively) Tammy Lynn Baxter.
EARL: Don't matter. They're all the same: dead weight. --- (oo, I broke a nail)----Can't make a decision, can't walk because of their shoes, can't work because of their fingernails.------ Makes my skin crawl!
VAL: Well, I'm a victim of circumstance.
EARL: I thought you called it your pecker. Look, don't make the mistake I made. Twenty years of looking for a woman like Miss October 1968, and where'd it get me? Here with you.

Quote: VAL: Yeah...a diversion...somethin' to keep 'em busy...like a decoy!
EARL: Hey Melvin... wanna make a buck?
Quote: Earl: Well I guess we don't get to make fun of Burt's lifestyle anymore.

Quote: Earl: Does it smell like that 'cause it's dead?
Quote: Earl: That means we're stuck. That pisses me off!
Quote: We plan ahead, that way we don't do anything right now. Earl explained it to me.
Quote: should have been packing full auto preferably belt fed
Quote: Val: Hey, why don't you just back off string bean, we could have left your worthless ass on the roof! Burt: I wish you had fearless leader, who the hell put you two in charge?!?! Val: Don't you push me, don't you God damn push me!
Quote: If you don't knock it off, you're gonna be shittin' this basket ball!
Quote: What the hell, I mean what the hell is going on?!?!?!
Quote: After eating all those sheep they's have to take a dump someplace.
Quote: Cold my ass...he's dead!
Quote: I wouldn't give you a gun if it was World War III!
Quote: Way to go dude!!!!No WAy MAN no way!!!!
Quote: we got ourselves a plan
Quote: Ain't no way these were local boy's
Quote: We killed it... We killed it... FUUUUUCCCK YOOOU!
Quote: Now hold on there a minute Val, lets not go off half-cocked.
Quote: Hey, hey, HEY! WAKE UP PEOPLE! *points on map* They got old man -name-'s place right here, chaced up the booze hound over hear, nailed those two poor suckers on the road there, and the doctor's place is right here! This valley is just one long schmorga's bord. we have got to get out.
Quote: Melvin, if youre not careful, youre going to be shitting this basket ball! Pardon my french.
Quote: you guys know how to pole-vault?
Quote: Would you, SHUT UP!?
Quote: See, we plan ahead. That way we don't do anything right now.
Quote: We have to go to Bixby in the morning. The cinder blocks are in
Quote: Then where are the golden oldies coming from?
Quote: Well if it aint our old pal Stumpy
Quote: Just one of them couldn't eat up Fred and his whole flock of sheep
Quote: 1) What, no breakfast?
2) Its your turn.
Quote: 1) Why are you taking that vacuum cleaner..you never use it.
2) I like this vacuum cleaner, its good for parts. Besides we might hire ourselves a maid. Hadn't you thought of that?
Quote: Are you going to stand there in broad daylight and tell me I'm the reason we are still in Perfection?
Quote: What have you people got against being prepared?
Quote: Walter, these are hollowpoints but not hydroshock hollowpoints.
Excuse me, I thought bullets were bullets
Quote: We faced temptation and did not bend, God Damn praise the lord!
Quote: (1)I'm a victim of circumstance. (2) I thought you called it your pecker!
Quote: FUUUUUUUCK YOOOOU!
Quote: Thats why Heather and I moved here in the first place...geographic isolation.
Quote: Nobody handles garbage better than we do.
Quote: Runnings not a plan. Runnings what you do when a plan fails.
Quote: you know, i think they shoot right out of its mouth, and they hook ya.
Quote: dammit melvin! you came that close, (makes gesture with fingers) that close.
Quote: man he sure must have been drunk this time, edgar getchur butt down here!
Quote: But we can't all fit in the bulldozer.
Quote: slicker than snot on a doorknob
Quote: I like this vaccum cleaner!
Quote: Man...live ones smell worse than the dead ones.
Quote: Stupid son of a bitch...knocked itself cold.
Quote: That's how they get ya. They're under the goddamn ground!
Quote: Earl, here's some swiss cheese and some bullets.
Quote: Val: Walter, your phone is dead! Walter: I didn't do it!
Quote: I can't believe we said no to free beer!
Quote: Good morning, Mr. Bassett. This is your wake up call. Please move your ass.
Quote: I'm betting on outer space. No way these are local boys.
Quote: 1: Yeah, well, I'm a victim of circumstance.
2: I thought you called it your pecker.
Quote: 1: Damn it, listen to me. I'm older and wiser.
2: Yeah, well you're half right.
Quote: This valley is just one long smorgasbord.
Quote: You will have long blonde hair, big green eyes, world class breasts, ass that won't quit and legs that go all the way up.
Quote: You never plan ahead, you never take the long view, I mean here it is Monday and I'm already thinking of Wednesday... It is Monday, right?
Quote: 1: Is this a job for an intelligent man?
2: Well, show me one and I'll ask him.
Quote: Roger that Burt, and congratulations. Be advised, however, that there are two more, repeat, two more motherhumpers.
Quote: I can't believe we said no to free beer!
Quote: We plan ahead, that's why we aren't doing anything right now.
Quote: Them Graboids don't kill him, I will.
Quote: BURT: A few household chemicals in the proper perportion.
Quote: VAL: CAN YOU FLY SUCKER? CAN YOU FLY?
Quote: BURT: A FEW HOUSEHOLD CHEMICALS AND THE PROPER PERPORTION
Quote: VAL: CAN YOU FLY SUCKER? CAN YOU FLY?
Quote: Would you shut up?
Quote: Man, the live ones smell worse than the dead ones.
Quote: Hey Mindy! What's the count?!

The quotes above are distinct quotations from the associated movie.